Jeez, where do I start.
1. Sunday best is Arthur Price
2. Spoon. I have one spoon left over from a previous set. It’s the right shape for eating my porridge. If it’s not in the drawer I have to find it and wash it, the replacements are the wrong shape completely. The comforting feel of its beaded-edged handle soothes my morning mood immeasurably.
3. Knives and forks. This is the cause of endless discussion chez scape. It is wrong to eat any food with a knife and fork which are not both proper dinner-sized; the smaller forks are for puddings, and the smaller knives are for sideplates. A combination of different sizes will spoil my meal, no matter how mad you make me out to be. I didn’t reach this age and status by eating with incorrectly sized cutlery. On the subject of forks, I have “appropriated” a selection of cheap canteen style forks for you kids to take to college to eat your lunches with. If you take the large matching dinner forks with you and then leave them festering in your college bag, don’t expect to start eating your evening meal until they have all been accounted for, and are present and correct, on the table, with a corresponding dinner knife. And yes, it does matter dear. You chose to buy a cutlery set with only four knives and forks, and I will not allow us to descend to a situation where we have a ragbag of mis-matched cutlery on the table.
4. Spreading butter. The narrow tipped dinner knives we have now got in the drawer are great for cutting and eating meat. They are not the right shape for spreading butter. The one remaining beaded edged one from the same set as my porridge spoon does the job nicely.The other one, the one with the square-edged handle, would have been great, but the tip is the wrong shape after you used it as a screwdriver. It was crap for eating with though, as the end of the handle dug into my palm.
5. I like my red mug, because it holds an adult portion of tea and coffee. Those stupid white porcelain mugs are not the right size or shape for drinking out of, although the are great for measuring porridge oats and water in the morning. My red mug does NOT need putting in the dishwasher every time you find it on a table, work surface, or next to my armchair. I will use it through the day, rinsing it if I have to, but it gets washed every morning and then can be re-used as and when required.