Viewing 40 posts - 81 through 120 (of 139 total)
  • Ever tempted to, umm, "play away from home"?
  • martinhutch
    Full Member

    That his sheafed weapon had only slain one woman

    Bit of a corny line there, Hora.

    hora
    Free Member

    Ever tempted to, umm, “play away from home”?

    umm yes, its Summer. If your not then you are a girlyman :mrgreen:

    cinnamon_girl
    Full Member

    Blimey, Hora’s on top form today. 😆

    Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middling Edition

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    hora
    Free Member

    Its a Friday, MC Hammers on the radio and its almost hometime!

    Tom-B
    Free Member

    Its a Friday, MC Hammers on the radio and its almost hometime! hammertime

    binners
    Full Member

    Nothing like MC hammer to get those loins stirring in time for the weekend

    scud
    Free Member

    5 minutes of pleasure (with foreplay)…a lifetime of remorse.

    bearnecessities
    Full Member

    “You can’t touch this”
    “Oh, ok you can”
    “No?”
    “Oh please”

    chewkw
    Free Member

    BigDummy – Member

    regardless of how you shower

    I’m not sure you’re doing showering quite right.

    You can always use this? Yes? Takes away fishy smell or use a two pence copper coin … 😆

    I have no luck whatsoever with the female species after my ex … hmmm … 😯

    monkeysfeet
    Free Member

    Mrs Monkeysfeet (married 16 yrs) often asks if I would ever have an affair. My reply ” I couldn’t be arsed” 😀

    Pyro
    Full Member

    One of my GF’s mates once asked if I ever fancied/did anything untoward with any of the young student ladies we got coming to the University canoe club I coach.

    I pointed out that as a slightly overweight, bearded, ugly bloke in his 30s, if any attractive, nubile teenage girl were to proposition me, I’d probably be laughing so hard I’d be unable to accept.

    midlifecrashes
    Full Member

    Just popped in to see if Hora’s stream of barely consciousness has come up with any new gems. He has too, priceless. He’s like a beta tester for thoughts! 🙂

    MrWoppit
    Free Member

    hora – Member
    Look on the bright side OP. Theres always the internet. It makes us men like Hamsters running round a wheel…

    I have NO IDEA what this means…

    globalti
    Free Member

    Mrs Monkeysfeet (married 16 yrs) often asks if I would ever have an affair. My reply ” I couldn’t be arsed”

    Damn right. Imagine being harassed, insulted and moaned at by TWO wives. I sometimes ask my Muslim customers how they have the strength.

    jambourgie
    Free Member

    Seems like there are a lot of reasons not to, and only one reason to do it.

    True, depends how hot the one reason is.

    hora
    Free Member

    Mr Woppit. Look at the pic I posted it against. 2+2? Oh give up. Its like having Sheldon Cooper from a Comprehensive school 🙄

    wallop
    Full Member

    Mmmmm, yeah – Hora describing himself as a “geezer” is a massive turn on 😆

    wrecker
    Free Member

    True, depends how hot the one reason is.

    Also true. I’m an avid admirer of boobies. They are my Achilles heel. I try not to look but, well you know how it is….

    TerryWrist
    Free Member

    Wow, didn’t expect this many responses. And feel especially honoured to receive the wisdom and advice of hora.

    I’m questioning if I did the right thing after all after his input.

    (I’m not really BTW. But happy to add “comprehensive school Sheldon Cooper” to my list of insults)

    Rockape63
    Free Member

    I must admit that all thoughts of my wife and marital harmony went straight out of the window today when this vision of gorgeousness got out of her car at the petrol garage and walked past me 10 mins with her would have been worth a lifetime of regret!

    hatter
    Full Member

    Oi, stop ogling my mum!

    alpin
    Free Member

    mahogany is hard…. harder than monogamy.

    often wondered whether we are cut out for the one partner thing.

    it’s summer now, 31°C in town today. my ride home from work gets longer the hotter it gets. a ride a long the river is a must.

    JCL
    Free Member

    Too much to loose so not worth the risk for me. Women go nuts in these situations.

    I occasionally pay for a professional ‘massage’ when the hand in under performing.

    allthepies
    Free Member

    often ? 😮

    What’s her answer when you ask her ?

    teamhurtmore
    Free Member

    Lucky that a great friend gave me ten great tips to ensure happiness in life a long time ago. The seventh was in the OPs situation clearly don’t/avoid. Seeing the misery that is involved when that simple guide is ignored makes me thankful to have such a good friend who gives such simple, sound advice.

    twinw4ll
    Free Member

    If you do just make sure the wife is agreeable, someones got to hold the video camera.

    monkeysfeet
    Free Member

    often ?

    What’s her answer when you ask her ?

    I work away from home, plus the fact I look like a greek god means she often worries 😆

    (only joking, it has come up in conversation from time to time. Often was perhaps the wrong word)

    samuri
    Free Member

    We went out the other day for a pub lunch. Waitress was very friendly to both my wife and I (married 15 years). Plenty of joking going on between us all, good friendly chatter, it was a good meal. At the end of the meal I went to pay the bill and the waitress, who I should point out was mid-twenties and very attractive, I’m late fourties, balding, glass bottle bottom glasses, bad teeth etc… had a bit of a joke with me, took my money and everything and then handed me a card upon which she’d written her name and mobile number and told me I could call her if I wanted to.

    Obviously I crapped myself. That card was two weeks of arguments and despite the fleeting thought of mmmmmmmmm!, I now had to get rid of it, sharpish. Which I managed to do with a subtle sleight of hand flick into the bin outside. Phew!

    It’s exciting and very flattering but simply not worth the hassle.

    Nobeerinthefridge
    Free Member

    Samuri, you don’t need a fanny magnet, you are one!

    jamj1974
    Full Member

    Never tempted. Too much too put at risk with a wife I love and children that are amazing (to me at least.). Also my loyalty, fidelity and integrity is part of who I am and who I want to be.

    I also think that already having what is for me a fulfilling physical relationship also helps…

    johndoh
    Free Member

    Also my loyalty, fidelity and integrity is part of who I am and who I want to be.

    Well said.

    bigblackshed
    Full Member

    Samuri.

    That was a test set up by your Wife.

    You failed BTW. 🙂

    RustySpanner
    Full Member

    Look, don’t touch.
    Just because you drive a FIAT, it doesn’t mean you can’t flip through the Ferrari catalogue now and then.

    Just read all this.
    In tears now.

    Top work everyone.

    hora
    Free Member

    Why not take the Tony Bliar approach? Do terrible stuff then wash away all your sins in confession.

    Why not shoot first-ask questions later.

    gofasterstripes
    Free Member

    Everyone hates the twunt now, that’s why not.

    edward2000
    Free Member

    My advice would be to stay away from scoring between the gammon goalposts. Not worth the hastle.

    dingabell
    Free Member

    I do believe edward2000 has just regained his title!

    MrWoppit
    Free Member

    hora – Member
    Mr Woppit. Look at the pic I posted it against. 2+2? Oh give up. Its like having Sheldon Cooper from a Comprehensive school

    So sorry, couldn’t find a “self-deprecatory ironic wink” emoticon.

    Please forgive me.

    hora
    Free Member

    On a serious note. Especially in hot weather- I want to fight or shag everything in sight still. Im only 42. Surely others still feel the same or am I now classed as a dirty old git?

    Or mid life crisis?

    bearnecessities
    Full Member

    On a serious note. Especially in hot weather- I want to fight or shag everything in sight still.

    What happens in B&Q when you pop in for a bit of decking; do you punch the clematis or bugger a parasol?

Viewing 40 posts - 81 through 120 (of 139 total)

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