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Embarrassing situation or what
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RamseyNeilFree Member
Just reading a book on which the story of Moby Dick was based . The whaling ships captain survives being sunk by a whale and spending months afloat in a small boat in the Pacific . When he eventually returns home he has to meet the mother of a teenage crew member who he’d promised to look after . He had to tell her not only had her son died but he had presided over having him shot so that the others on the boat could eat him. Can anybody on here come up with a more embarrassing real life story ?
NorthwindFull MemberFriend of mine reaches that age, and her mum decides to have the Conversation. “Aw mum, we had all this sex ed at school” “No Fiona (*), it’s not quite that conversation, it’s about your dad. Your real dad”. Turned out her genetic dad was a mad shagger and had fathered half the kids in the village. So for her The Conversation was “Don’t **** the locals, they’re all your brother”
(* I haven’t changed the names to protect the innocent, **** it)
Fresh Goods Friday 696: The Middling Edition
Latest Singletrack VideosFresh Goods Friday 696: The Middlin...TeetosugarsFree MemberI’d’ve though Hora & Renton discussing ‘bike fits’ would make for a pretty embarrassing conversation.
theotherjonvFull MemberNot so much a conversation but an embarrassing moment.
New bloke started at work and was being shown round. He had a corking shiner right under his eye, so muggins here comments ‘Bummer, to be trying to make a first impression with a shiner like that on your first day! Fight or sporting?’
‘It’s not a black eye, it’s a birthmark’
‘Ah. Nice to meet you’
He went on to be one of my best work friends, and frequently commented that his black eye still hadn’t gone down.
tangFree MemberMany years ago I was working on a building site and a guy came back from his week in Ibiza with this story:
He met a lovely local rep and went out for dinner all going nicely, she invited him back to her place and one thing led to another and he ended up staying the night.
When he woke in the morning she was no where to be seen, he gets up and finds his trousers missing with his wallet/cash/cards missing too. He immediately thinks he’s been had and in his rage he curls one off on the bed and makes his way out. As he’s passing the kitchen he noticed a utility room and hears a sound. To his horror the lady in question is ironing his trousers!kimbersFull MemberId just started a new job, I met the centre coordiantor, and one of my interviewers the week before, at a rather wild fetish club, kinda awkward for both of us really, it all worked out in the end though.
anniisonFree MemberChappy at uni got a bit frisky with a local, sweet but not so bright, lass from Manchester on a drunken night out. They did a lot of sweaty bumping and grinding in the club, before he went home with her.
As he gets home and begins snuggling between her bosoms he notices, even through the drunkeness, she smells a bit….’off’.
Anyways, he finally gets her bra off and two now very sweaty, sticky, and quite grim chicken breasts fall out the bra.
Hes now very confused and wanting to know WTF??? Turns out the new trend for boosting cleavage using ‘chicken fillets’ had been taken a little too literally by the poor lass. He made his excuses and left!
Wasnt sure who to be more embarrassed for! 😆
xyetiFree MemberI walked into a bike shop many Moons ago, there was a girl that worked in there and she was FIT, i really fancied her for ages but hadnt done anything about it, I was in my early 20’s at the Time, as i approached the counter she waltzed over and i just thought “OH Please god NO”……….. i had to ask her…..
Err, i’m after some of those little things that go erm at the end of the spokes, erm i’ve snapped a few and can’t get,,,,,
And she just went NIPPLES !
I could have died, i dont know why but i went Crimson.
A few years later i was in Town drinking and she was serving behind the bar, I asked her if she could remember, She could, That was the beginning of a very fruitful relationship 😆
myopicFree MemberMany years ago, I met my neighbour coming out of her house having not seen her for a few months. Glancing at her bump, I opened my big mouth and heard myself saying ‘Oh, congratulations, another one on the way! When’s it due?’ She glared at me and said through gritted teeth – ‘I’m not pregnant….’. Never spoke to me again.
To this day, I will never ask anyone who looks like they might be expecting ANYTHING about it until they bring it up, even if they look just about to dropghostlymachineFree MemberGetting to work on a Monday morning having spent most of the weekend balls deep in your line managers daughter. After taking her home from the departmental Christmas party.
Now THAT was embarrassing.
trailhound101Full MemberGetting to work on a Monday morning having spent most of the weekend balls deep in your line manager
daughter. After taking her home from the departmental Christmas party.Now THAT
wasreally would be embarrassing.[glances over at line manager… ]
xyetiFree MemberOH Hang on I’ve Got another, This Happened about 3 Years ago………….
Locally Biking from the School drop off and had a nice little loop about 18 miles long, Kept randomly seeing Mums at the School in Lycra pushing bikes, This went on with a few requests can we join you etc.
I wilted and took these 2 really Fit Athletically, Educated attractive Ladies with Professional jobs out for a spin.
There were no innundo’s no hint nor sign of sexual attraction just banter and some guidance from me on NOT changing gear and mashing sheet out of the drive train on the hills, lift off pretend pedal stroke etc, Seat too low etc. We got back i picked the little un up from school stood outside with the dog.ONE of the women came past and said……… My Bum is killing me i cant sit down i’m so sore. 😯
Tother came past and went…….. I Enjoyed that it was good, i feel a lot better same time next week 😯
I watched her pert little arse as she wandered off through the school gates and when i came to my senses there must have been 20 people stood staring at me.Any one with Kids Knows what is said on the school run goes round Like wildfire.
20 minutes later a car Pulls up outside, BIG Banging on the door, One of the women stood in the road with passenger door open, At this point i should explain that i live in a pretty respectable Village, People were milling about, returning home from work, school, dog walking etc.
I answered the door and this bloke shouted” YOU ****, You have been foookin my Mrs, i knew she was Fooookin some one, AND Now i know,
My wife was NOT Happy, I laughed at this bloke and said the single most stupid thing i have ever said,
“I think you have me confused with some one else mate, I haven’t BUT if i had YOU wouldnt know about it BUT if i ever do get the opportunity then i will”This took some explaining i can tell you.
Turns out he had her Mobile Phone records AND the bill from the Landline with this number she kept Ringing.
He had her Credit vard receipt for a Dinner for 2 in York last Friday night, Thank foooook, I was at home that night after being at work all day, at this point and after he started to calm down i took the number off him and rang it from my phone, It was the woman we had the 3 of us been out with earlier that day.Turns out the two of them were at it……….. 😳
Caught in a bizare love triangle, they are now living together……
We walked past the One who i implicated the other day and My Wife went, Oh look………. Would you, Of course i said NO……….
DracFull MemberThere’s a one about the guy who posted about the origins of Moby Dick in a Bike forum instead of a Chat.
Andy-RFull Memberghostlymachine – Member
Getting to work on a Monday morning having spent most of the weekend balls deep in your line managers daughter. After taking her home from the departmental Christmas party.Now THAT was embarrassing.
Why? Presumably she hadn’t told him all about it? I’d have just been feeling rather smug…….
ClobberFree MemberThere’s the one about the guy who went cycling with 2 ladies gagging for it and he didn’t even notice it..
jivehoneyjiveFree MemberHave you ever made breakfast for a chalet full of well acquainted paying guests including the teenage kids of the Milf you boffed on the chalet couch the night before?
Never did get those stains out.
2nd week on the job too… #professional
RustySpannerFull MemberAt the physio, recently.
Early appointment, long shift in work the day before.Get up, shower & the full Bateman.
Clean shirt, retrieve jeans from floor next to bed, shape meself and off to the hospital.Halfway through the first calf stretch, yesterdays snappers emerged from the bottom of the left leg of my jeans.
I looked at the physio and shrugged.
He looked back and did the same.
Nothing was said.I put the pants of shame back in my bag and we carried on as if nothing had happened.
It’s not the incident itself, I’ve dealt with that.
It’s the having to live with never, ever knowing what the physio has written on my notes that will finish me in the end.allthegearFree MemberNot really embarrassing to me at all but…
Assuming many of you know my recent history, the whole trans thing and that, I bumped into an old acquaintance at a mutual friend’s party. I hadn’t seen him since coming out, having bucketfuls of hormones and all that and, well, I’m somewhat different now.
Anyway, we we chatting at the bar and after a while I noticed how he was having that problem where men’s eyes seem to become somehow uncontrolled. “I’m up here, Craig” nearly killed him with embarrassment. I actually felt sorry for him.
Rachel
PigfaceFree MemberThere was a story on FB the other day that no doubt is an urban myth about a woman going for a smear test and glitter, made me chuckle.
perchypantherFree MemberThere was a story on FB the other day that no doubt is an urban myth about a woman going for a smear test and glitter, made me chuckle.
Had she recently bought a dangfangled frame with glitter forks?
globaltiFree MemberMany years ago, I met my neighbour coming out of her house having not seen her for a few months. Glancing at her bump, I opened my big mouth and heard myself saying ‘Oh, congratulations, another one on the way! When’s it due?’ She glared at me and said through gritted teeth – ‘I’m not pregnant….’. Never spoke to me again.
To this day, I will never ask anyone who looks like they might be expecting ANYTHING about it until they bring it up, even if they look just about to dropI could have written this myself; definitely the most embarrassing thing that’s ever happened to me. It was a woman I knew from the pub and she was out for a walk with her boyfriend.
jon1973Free Member“your son was a second rate sailor, but a first rate second course”
ghostlymachineFree MemberReally? I’d never met the girl before the party. Proceeded to score, leave early and then take her home 2 days later.
Her father was at the party (obviously) and i was the placement student.
Didn’t go down well.
MoreCashThanDashFull MemberDidn’t go down well
Brave of you to admit that on here
NZColFull MemberA bit like jivehoneyjive I had the acquaintance of a couple of ladies who were on hols (with their families) separately during a ski season, then one day I was chatting to one who was back again with family when the other one turned up as well. Yes, they were best friends. Yes they had discussed this naughty time they had on holiday with each other, yes they both looked at me, yes I thought “right…this could go one of two ways”. It didn’t sadly but to this day I still have the satisfaction of that moment !
fionapFull MemberFriend of mine reaches that age, and her mum decides to have the Conversation. “Aw mum, we had all this sex ed at school” “No Fiona (*), it’s not quite that conversation, it’s about your dad. Your real dad”. Turned out her genetic dad was a mad shagger and had fathered half the kids in the village. So for her The Conversation was “Don’t **** the locals, they’re all your brother”
(* I haven’t changed the names to protect the innocent, **** it)
😯tops5Free MemberDidn’t go down well
Brave of you to admit that on hereChapeau sir! 🙂
ghostlymachineFree MemberFriend of mine reaches that age, and her mum decides to have the Conversation.
Had a very similar tale in the village i was brought up in. One of the local “lads” had a very successful few months one summer (Dunno how you measure success in such things).
But about half a dozen, maybe more, of the kids in that year at school were potential candidates for being brothers/sisters. To add insult to injury, his youngest brother (shag monster was the eldest of 4 or 5) was in the same year.Quite the scandal at the time.
Then i moved to a place near Mansfield, where (at the time) it was considered normal.
jivehoneyjiveFree MemberJust remembered another one… was my cousin’s wedding in France; due to a family dispute between my mum and her sister that went on for several years (silly buggers, sometimes all it takes is a good bit of open discussion and mutual respect), never knew that side of the family very well.
So, making acquaintance with some fellow wedding goers, one approached me and said ‘Tom, great to see you’ I was a bit unsettled, because I didn’t recognize them, so had to ask who they were.
Yep, it was my cousin, the groom.
It was only the fact that I had badass wolverine sideburns at the time that stopped the ground from swallowing me up there and then.
zippykonaFull MemberAt a film awards ceremony we had to attend in film star fancy dress. There were a few blokes there done up as women.
I walked up to one of them and said,” you make a bloody ugly woman” . As the words were seeping out of my mouth I realised that she was in fact a proper woman.
My brain computed that there were no words that could get me out of this faux pas so I turned around and walked off.
In my defence she did look like a bloke.santacruzsiFree MemberZippykona… love it…
A while ago me and a mate were slagging off a colleague via text on our work phones. I composed quite a scathing message, chose the recipient and pressed ‘send’….
As my thumb was heading towards the send button i realised something wasn’t quite right but continuted uncontrollably until i pressed said button. I’d only sent to her the colleague we were slagging rather than my mate (from work). I willed the phone to break, took the battery out, but no, it sent…
Made an embarrassing Monday morning…
RetrodirectFree Member@ Xyeti
I have a female friend who works in a bikeshop who takes great pleasure in this very thing.
maccruiskeenFull MemberIn my late teens hanging about in Manchester with some friends – we had some time to kill waiting for a lift and were killing it by jumping down flights of stairs in a proto-parkour manner. There was a sort of double flight of steps and we were debating whether with enough momentum it was possible to clear them in a oner. We a bit of cajoling I decided to give it a go. Big big run up, hit it at full pelt and as I launched a besuited gent, (possibly from the law courts across the way) stepped round the corner and right into my landing spot. I tried to somehow brake in mid-air and couldn’t drop and roll on landing as I’d just take him out. So I had to sort of land rigid – practically on his toes. Managed not to hit him, but I was right in his face and this electric shock pain short right up my legs from my heals with the impact – which made me scream like banshee.
He’d been completely unaware of me until I was right in his face screaming. The next thing i was aware of is I’d landed so heavily that my trousers were now round my ankles. He looked down – I looked down – I quickly pulled them up again and when I looked up again he’d completely vanished.
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