The biscuit tub in the office has been restocked with Jammie dodgers, I like a good biscuit dip in my coffee but this feels wrong and there’s no dark choc hob-nobs left

My morning is now full of doubt and confusion

Is the jammy bit just in the middle or does it extend to the edges?

Any fondant?

I normally dunk the edges first, saving the jammy bit for last.

And coffee?
Are you sure you’re from Yorkshire?

Let’s sort a few things here:
1 a brew is a cup of tea, not coffee.
2 wrong uns dunk biscuits in coffee, tea or milk are the only acceptable choices
3 Jammie dodgers are only suitable for dunking in milk
4 dark chocolate is wrong

You are now no longer confused or full of doubt 😀

Twist and separate.

[video]https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=xeQ3LyvmDkM[/video]

Hmmmm. Jammie Dodgers are poor excuses for biscuits regardless of whether they are dunked or not…only a small step up from the bland-ness of a custard cream.

The jam in them is more like strawberry glue……I love biscuits, but wouldn’t bother with a jammie dodger.

Bin the whole lot, buy some hobnobs.

I wouldn’t, it’ll affect the taste of brew and mess about with if you taste the sugar in the brew or not.

stumpy01 – Member
…only a small step up from the bland-ness of a custard cream.

Weirdo.

The CC is the perfect dunking biscuit.
And it’s not bland, it’s a subtle yet elegant lesson in biscuit simplicity.

And it’s not bland, it’s a subtle yet elegant lesson in biscuit simplicity.

No, they’re a subtle hint that your host doesn’t like you very much.

And it’s not bland, it’s a subtle yet elegant lesson in biscuit simplicity.

No, they’re a subtle hint that your host doesn’t like you very much.

…..and so, with these first innocuous exchanges, the Great Biscuit War of 2017 sparked into life….. The initial spark which would eventually consume the world in flames.

#TeamCustardCream

#TeamEveryOtherBiscuit

#TeamEveryOtherBiscuit

Except NICE
who on earth wants coconut dipped in their cuppa?

#TeamEveryOtherBiscuit

We must destroy the infidel.
The faithful will be rewarded in Bourbon and Garibaldi

#gingernutsforthewin

perfect on their own, dunked in tea and dunked in milk, work dunked singularly or back to back doubled up stylee 😀

Dipping a jammie dodger in my brew

Reported.

Leave ’em perchy, they’re just not worth it.
😐

Gingernuts are indeed a fine biscuit.
But they lack the detailing of the CC.
And I find their lack of a textual hinterland, combined with a tendency to premature soggyness renders them a little one dimensional.

Leave ’em, perchy, they’re just not worth it.

It’s the pies all over again.

Why do I torture myself so?

Surely ginger nuts are the pinnacle of biscuit-dunking? Bourbons are a poor excuse for a biscuit: like cocoa-tinged cardboard. Any anyone who dunks chocolate biscuits is clearly unhinged. Why would you want chocolatey silt in your brew?

#AnythingButThePinkWafer

#OrTheLemonCreamThatMakesTheEntireFrikkinBiscuitBarrelTasteLemony

Have you tried one of those jars of custard cream spread?

Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmmm

I could eat myself sick and not regret a second of it.

#gingernutsforthewin

This, the perfect accompaniment for a proper cup of tea. Not overly sweet, substantial. Also ginger is known to help reduce nausea, making it the quintessential ‘morning after’ dunk whilst you contemplate the wreckage of your existence.

Frankly, you’d have to be insane to choose a different biscuit, and your proclamations on any other subject should be viewed with deep suspicion as a result.

Dunking is for uncouth savages.

I suppose you dip bread into your soup as well.

Now Malted Milks. They are the queen of dunkers. No need to bite a corner off those babies to get them to fit in the cup. And plenty of absorption capability before they break off. Mind you, leave em a nanosecond too long and they can cause a tidal wave of tea splash-age if you don’t manage to get them in your gob quick enough.

Can i just put malted milk biscuits in to the mix.

Edit: just beaten to it so i will add malted milk to the solitary vote so far.

It’s the pies all over again.

Why do I torture myself so?

Walking the paths of righteousness is often a lonely and harsh experience, but you are not alone #TeamCustardCream

Now Malted Milks. They are the queen of dunkers. No need to bite a corner off those babies to get them to fit in the cup. And plenty of absorption capability before they break off. Mind you, leave em a nanosecond too long and they can cause a tidal wave of tea splash-age if you don’t manage to get them in your gob quick enough.

1. Wrong cup size
2. No resiliance under absorption
3. Random failure under liquid load
4. Tendency to separate under panic fishing following 3.
5. You’re obviously nuts, but not ginger nuts

A dark chocolate chip hob-nob has to be the pinnacle, not the ginger nut.
It holds the resiliency and ability to absorb a good amount of liquid without catastrophic failure. You also get the chocyness without the scum from a covered biscuit.

Hilarious…..

Jammie Dodgers
Custard Creams
Ginger Nuts
and now…..Malted Milk of all things!!

You lot clearly know nothing!!

spawnofyorkshire – Member

A dark chocolate chip hob-nob has to be the pinnacle, not the ginger nut.
It holds the resiliency and ability to absorb a good amount of liquid without catastrophic failure. You also get the chocyness without the scum from a covered biscuit.

This man clearly knows his onions biscuits…. 😆

Whilst you lot argue I’m sitting here thinking I’d happily polish off a pack of any* of the aforementioned biscuits without a second thought. I’m not fussy. I am, however, becoming increasingly porky.

*Actually maybe not the pink wafers. Think I’d be bored after about half a pack.

*EDIT* oh yeah, and Jammie Dodgers are bloody amazing. Especially dunked in coffee. Yeah, you ‘eard.

I’d contend that a double deck cream filled biscuit gives increased absorption capacity as each biscuit is only exposed to the beverage on one side. That means there is a dry layer of biscuity reinforcement available which wouldn’t be there unless the single layer biccy is twice the thickness.

Furthermore the choccy chips (or other fruit and nut additives) act as seeds for cracks to form in the moistened biscuit, increasing its propensity to fail under continuous dunking (fucd). Similarly a single sided coat of chocolate will also soften and weaken the structure, causing those biscuits to be fucd as well.

In fact a decent layer of filling will act in a similar way to a laminated beam, giving increased resilience and meaning custard creams and bourbons and jammie dodgers are less likely to be fucd.

All of the above is subject to the caveat that lemon creams are excluded, because they are proper minging.

I’m proudly polyperverse when it comes to dunking.

I can happily swing both ways when comes to the choice of dunking vs. not dunking AND the choice of tea vs. coffee.

However, if forced to state a biscuit preference for the dunk, I tend to favour the slightly lower-rent varieties, such as the Abernethy – infinitely superior to a Rich Tea, maintains its integrity well when saturated, and has a pleasingly granular mouth-feel.

If you’re going to dunk, I think that you just have to accept a certain amount of collateral damage to your brew. However, I find that Hob-Nobs are the upper end of this, leaving your empty mug resembling a cell wall in the Maze prison, circa 1981.

I love dunking ginger nuts in a scalding hot cup of coffee, although these days it’s called bullying.

3. Random failure under liquid load

This, a thousand times yes. Many a decent cuppa has been ruined by most of a malted milk hurling itself into the cup, never to be fished out.

Currently sat here with a pack of bourbons. Not quite up to hobnob standards, but not bad.

Dark chocolate chip hob nobs are the fat bike of the biscuit world.

Firstly: arguing about the suitability of biscuits for dunking is like arguing about what’s the crayon for drawing on walls or whether You should exhaust the fingers on your left or right hand first when counting. You could do it, there may even be a best way, but frankly its something you should grow out of at about the same time as crawling.

Second: none of the above biscuits are best (hobnobs come close but fall at an important hurdle…): All the best biscuits are made by Foxes. Jammie dodger? I raise you a jam ring, with cream. Ginger biscuits? I give you the ginger crunch cream.

Surly the only biscuit to dunk is the jaffa cake?

Surly the only biscuit to dunk is the jaffa cake?

This sentence couldn’t be more wrong if it tried.

Not even a biscuit. IT’S A CAKE!!!

Why does it come in a biscuit shaped packet then eh preachypanther?

Because it’s the same size as a biscuit?

But then again so is the coaster under my coffee cup but that ain’t a biscuit either.

The law of the land hath decreed it to be a cake.

https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Jaffa_Cakes#Categorisation_as_cake_or_biscuit_for_VAT

That preachy enough for ya? 😉