Mrs PM is expecting and having a hard time lof it. I'm busting a gut trying to be two steps ahead to keep her happy, this morning's bombshell "you're (meaning me) too much of a doormat, I don't respect you anymore."
I won't go on here as I'm typing one fingered on an iPod but basically evrything I do is wrong and she's never happy when I'm around.
Please does it get better?

Yes, in about 20 years…..

Father of 3….

Welcome aboard, son.

too much of a doormat, I don't respect you anymore

tell her to **** off and take herself to the maternity ward when it's time and get the nurse to give you a call as you'll be in the pub.

it does get better (sometimes) but it's a big scary change for all concerned and there are going to be a few tense moments. Most expectant dads I know (myself included)went through a phase of "****, my life is over that's it I'm committed to this and responsible for another persons life, how do I get out this, ooooo she's pretty and not pregnant" it soon passes, but I'm sure women go through a similar " **** that useless tool is going to be a father and he couldn't organise a bun fight at kiplings etc…"

ooooo she's pretty and not pregnant

thats what did it for me!!
nice one, and spot on tazzymtb.

he he. It never gets better.

Once the child is born you're bottom of the heap pal. The cat now has a higher priority than you. The best thing you can do for your family now is die and leave them a huge insurance win.

As a dad of 3, who's had a drink, I spent a bit of time with our first thinking 'when does this all get better', which really meant 'when do I get my old life back'. Then a about 8 weeks in, it just hit me that it never will, and that this was it. But I also realised, that those few months I'd spent thinking that, were just missing the point. All the time waiting for it to get better, is just missing what you have. Kids change so fast that everyday you spend wishing it gone, is a day you have lost. You have to enjoy the journey, the ups and downs, I wouldn't wanted to have missed a minute of it, and I still get to bike and booze! But it could be, your missus is a bit of a bag?

She isn't a bag, she is pumped full of hormones. Step back, give her space but be you. It is amazing so be together and enjoy the ride.

Sounds about right, thats why me and my sons yampy mom split up when he was 3.

I now have a proper wife..

Good luck 😉

Women. They're all mental. And then when they get cheggers, they become even more mental. I think 16 months after, my missis is still mental, it's just a different style.

Please does it get better?

IME…………..no 8)

It will change…… You think she's hardwork now, wait till your both sleep deprived

The mentalness goes up and down throughout the pregnancy. She will be more nuts than you have ever experienced – and then some. Once the baby arrives, her baby brain gets worse for a bit as the hormones are still rushing around.

Then you have the baby and that will beat the lunacy of the wife no matter what she does – in a good way. Be the consistent bloke you are being – it isn't her speaking – IT IS THE MONSTER INSIDE HER!!!

😉

I'll be honest mate its hardcore, lost sleep when they are sick little, and in general (as in I wouldnt be up at 0615 on a sunday with out an amazingly good reason ie road trip), less money, and less well you know….. Two things Kids are amazing they are great fun I have two one about 16months and one three next month. Its a bit like having a pet if I'm honest as in you have to do everything bring them every where and you dont get thanks.

However the older they get the easier it gets they feed themsevles with out wearing most of it and use the loo etc etc. once they begin to interact talk smile etc its all worth while. Then they start becoming independent play on bikes, chat to you get excited about really random stuff. But its a big change for your life mate I wont pretend, your life's not over its just changed I would be tempted to give your MRS the benefit of the doubt. Remember though your not there to be treated like shite. How far along is she??

Excuse the spelling and typos this has taken four sessions of typing bless the two of them 🙄

Thanks Wookster, I've been up since 6 tiptoeing around as the tension in the bedroom wasn't condusive to sleep. You have given me faith.

Great to hear other people living my life!

On the bright side, having kids makes you appreciate the local MILF's a lot more. And there are always the flirty young ladies working in the nursery to perv over….

Hormones and tiredness though, killer combination. I was once on the receiving end of an argument for 'looking smug' when asleep.

It'll slowly get easier over the next 14 years, then it'll get get hard/stressful again for a few years before calming down again

Then they'll put you in a care home 🙂

I was once on the receiving end of an argument for 'looking smug' when asleep.

😆

the first 4 years are the worst. If you make the mistake of having more than one child, the first 4 years lasts longer 🙁

(daughter 18, son 14. I love them dearly now they're people)

It could mean that she just doesn't love you anymore. Harsh but some of the stuff already written up there is patronising beyond belief.
Just because she's pregnant doesn't mean she's lost her sanity.
I thnk it would be a very good idea to bite back and find out what the hell is really going on.
Retrospectively, that could cheer you up. You can get out of there before the real nightmare begins when she comes home from hospital. You'll only have to endure it every other weekend (if you insist on it).

monksie_
It could mean that she just doesn't love you anymore.

Which part of …

tell me tales to cheer me up

… don't you understand 😯

see above

Just because she's pregnant doesn't mean she's lost her sanity.

It does.

nope

I have consulted she who must be obeyed on your problem..

My other half was surprised at how much I tried to help when she was pregnant.. delighted in fact.. A whole heap of women that she spoke to had told her to take advantage of me.. and to get what she could out of the situation..

'oh yeah.. blokes will do ANYTHING for you when you're pregnant.. take him for everything you can'

Being a genuinely good person she did no such thing and ignored the advice.. maybe your other half has received similar advice and is now regretting her actions cos she feels she's turned you into a doormat..? If she's actively TRYING to take advantage then maybe it's gonna be easier for her to feel like you're a pushover..

I recommend a bout of the Leo Sayers in the pub.. (all dayers) followed by some wife beating.. try also seducing her sister/mother/best friend

Maybe I can put a smile on your face with these few words of wisdom that were passed onto me……

I hope you have both prepared for this….

FOLLOW THESE 14 SIMPLE TESTS BEFORE YOU DECIDE TO HAVE CHILDREN.

Test 1 – Preparation

Women: To prepare for pregnancy:-

1. Put on a dressing gown and stick a beanbag down the front.
2. Leave it there.

3. After 9 months remove 5% of the beans.

Men: To prepare for children:-

1. Go to a local chemist, tip the contents of your wallet onto the
counter and tell the pharmacist to help himself
2. Go to the supermarket. Arrange to have your salary paid directly to
their head office.
3. Go home. Pick up the newspaper and read it for the last time.

Test 2 – Knowledge

Find a couple who are already parents and berate them about their
methods of discipline, lack of patience, appallingly low tolerance
levels and how they have allowed their children to run wild. Suggest
ways in which
they might improve their child's sleeping habits, toilet training, table
manners and overall behavior.
Enjoy it. It will be the last time in your life that you will have all
the answers.

Test 3 – Nights

To discover how the nights will feel:

1. Walk around the living room from 5pm to 10pm carrying a wet bag
weighing approximately 4 – 6kg, with a radio turned to static (or some
other obnoxious sound) playing loudly.
2. At 10pm, put the bag down, set the alarm for midnight and go to
sleep.
3. Get up at 11pm and walk the bag around the living room until 1am.
4. Set the alarm for 3am.
5. As you can't get back to sleep, get up at 2am and make a cup of tea.
6. Go to bed at 2.45am.
7. Get up again at 3am when the alarm goes off.
8. Sing songs in the dark until 4am.
9. Put the alarm on for 5am. Get up when it goes off.
10. Make breakfast.

Keep this up for 5 years. LOOK CHEERFUL.

Test 4 – Dressing Small Children

1. Buy a live octopus and a string bag.
2. Attempt to put the octopus into the string bag so that no arms hang
out.
Time Allowed: 5 minutes.

Test 5 – Cars

1. Forget the BMW. Buy a practical 5-door MPV.
2. Buy a chocolate ice cream cone and put it in the glove compartment.
Leave it there.
3. Get a coin. Insert it into the CD player.
4. Take a box of chocolate biscuits; mash them into the back seat.
5. Run a garden rake along both sides of the car.
Test 6 – Going For a Walk

Wait
Go out the front door
Come back in again
Go out
Come back in again
Go out again
Walk down the front path
Walk back up it
Walk down it again
Walk very slowly down the road for five minutes.
Stop, inspect minutely and ask at least 6 questions about every piece of
used chewing gum, dirty tissue and dead insect along the way.
Retrace your steps
Scream that you have had as much as you can stand until the neighbours
come out and stare at you.
Give up and go back into the house.
You are now just about ready to try taking a small child for a walk.

Test 7
Repeat everything you say at least 5 times.

Test 8 – Grocery Shopping

1. Go to the local supermarket. Take with you the nearest thing you can
find to a pre-school child – a fully grown goat is excellent. If you
intend to have more than one child, take more than one goat.
2. Buy your weekly groceries without letting the goat(s) out of your
sight.
3. Pay for everything the goat eats or destroys.

Until you can easily accomplish this, do not even contemplate having
children.

Test 9 – Feeding a 1 year-old

1. Hollow out a melon
2. Make a small hole in the side
3. Suspend the melon from the ceiling and swing it side to side
4. Now get a bowl of soggy cornflakes and attempt to land them into the
swaying melon while pretending to be an aeroplane.
5. Continue until half the cornflakes are gone.
6. Tip the rest into your lap, making sure that a lot of it falls on the
floor.
Test 10 – TV

1. Learn the names of every character from the Wiggles, Barney,
Teletubbies and Disney.
2. Watch nothing else on television for at least 5 years.

Test 11 – Mess

Can you stand the mess children make? To find out:
1. Smear peanut butter onto the sofa and jam onto the curtains
2. Hide a fish behind the stereo and leave it there all summer.
3. Stick your fingers in the flowerbeds and then rub them on clean
walls. Cover the stains with crayon. How does that look?
4. Empty every drawer/cupboard/storage box in your house onto the floor
& leave it there.

Test 12 – Long Trips with Toddlers

1. Make a recording of someone shouting 'Mummy' repeatedly. Important
Notes: No more than a 4 second delay between each Mummy. Include
occasional crescendo to the level of a supersonic jet.
2. Play this tape in your car, everywhere you go for the next 4 years.
You are now ready to take a long trip with a toddler.

Test 13 – Conversations
1. Start talking to an adult of your choice.
2. Have someone else continually tug on your shirt hem or shirt sleeve
while playing the Mummy tape listed above.
You are now ready to have a conversation with an adult while there is a
child in the room.

Test 14 – Getting ready for work

1. Pick a day on which you have an important meeting.
2. Put on your finest work attire.
3. Take a cup of cream and put 1 cup of lemon juice in it
4. Stir
5. Dump half of it on your nice silk shirt
6. Saturate a towel with the other half of the mixture
7. Attempt to clean your shirt with the same saturated towel
8. Do not change (you have no time).
9. Go directly to work

You are now ready to have children.
Good luck and enjoy.

it does

Muke… 😀

Just got to go with it pal, like everyone says it's what you make it….this includes your life with the missus because things do change between you both especially when she see's that she is dealing with the bulk of child care and responsibility she will soon get cheesed off with the man who just swans off to work each day, comes home and then says he's off for a blast on the bike (experience talking here)!! You really have to see how things pan out once the little un is born because things will find there own level after this.

Ask her nicely to moderate her tone a bit. If this fails bite back and don't be swayed by tears. (Think PMT and then some for the hormonal disruption). This is no excuse for a lack of good manners and mutual respect. Once you have achieved an adult situation things will improve no end.
Once the baby arrives it's a whole new game and world, enjoy it all you're making the shared memories for later life.

I was once on the receiving end of an argument for 'looking smug' when asleep.

lol!

Practical Matt – good luck. This is one of your many big tests in life.

I like the words above about ladies having "The Monster Inside", I guess us blokes have the same (apart from it being between your legs).

Try "Men are form Mars women are from Venus" book. It helps you see that we are all ok people, its just we are different. try to accept those differences and you've cracked it. Its not easy though, for anyone. Someone is having a sick joke on us. Being gay in your next life may help.

The fact you have bothered to raise the question means you will be ok. I like a catchphrase of a friend "love your bike"… it wont let you done.
You'll be fine. Kids are great. Mothers take some dealing with.

"Please does it get better?"

Yes, for some of the time.

IMHE most things worth having take a bit of work – stick at it (but don't feel bad about bunking off occasionally for a rest (and encourage her to do the same)).

still getting to grips with our 7 week old…. i summed it up when the baby was born, about an hour after she was born i said to the wife "great, i now have my wife back"…

don't read any of the books, my mother in law was right, "ignorance is bliss" the more books or websites you visit regarding babies the more paranoia it will fill you with. just go with he flow and find your own way.

each to their own but the amount of bullshit books and websites out there (90% designed to take your cash) is amazing, how did they bloody cope years ago, easy…. thats how.

oh all the woman you know, mother, mother in law, your other halfs friends will ALL chnage into freaks for nine months.

i tend to see the female point of view these days…
i stay home to look after our two sprogs while our lass brings in the coin,when most men learn that this is what i do i usually get a big grin and some comment about it being a doss or an easy life.
this tells me that most men are w@nkers 😀

She probably is a bit of a hormonal mess at the moment unfortunately. I thought I had got away with not going mental, but now at 38 weeks pregnant I am either horrifically grumpy (becuase I can't sleep or get comfortable and contstantly need a wee) or cry at the drop of a hat. Oh and need constant reassurance that I do not actually look like whale, even though I feel like one 😀

it does get better but its hard work at times.

But kids are funny and you'll see loads of early morning tv, and some of the female presenters on kids tv are nice 🙂

But sell your bikes, you'll never get to ride them. (father one 20 months, one 3 months)

I'm in the same boat with child no.2 on the way……wondering what I have let myself in for as I only feel I have my head round no.1 for 50% of the time.

There is a certain amount of digging in to be done on your part, both in terms of the grief from the other half and the fact that your life will no longer be yours….

I would second what others have said about trying to enjoy your kids growing up whilst it lasts and accepting the moved goalposts.

BUT the "you're too much of a doormat" comment I couldn't let go. I'd say let the immediate tension dissipate (possibly by going out for a ride) and then have a sit down conversation with your Mrs along the lines of "do you REALLY want me to oblige you less?"

I've got two boys 9 and 5. I wouldn't let the missus talk to me like that pregnant or not, needs to be sorted really as that's just rude and you have your own worries and fears too, getting a kicking doesn't help, need to talk it through and let her know it's not on but you appreciate she's not on top form.

As for the rest I've not decorated for three years because there is just no point, they wreck everything, do things that leave me completely perplexed, fight constantly, can destroy toys in less time than it takes to go and buy them, eat like – well how does 400 a month sound in the supermarket, get through clothes so the washing machine is almost always on, scream loudly at 6am, and are the best thing ever.

Join the club. We should all go out for a pint if out wives will let us.

Kids rule. Women need a lot of love and space. Enjoy it, enjoy the freedom whilst you get out of her way.