My speedo flicked up to a touch more than the speed limit on the M1 on the way home last night which got me wondering…

If stopped and clearly bang to rights what is generally the best form of discussion.

1. I didn’t notice? Surely that’s got you bang on for due care and attention.
2. Yeah sorry, I wanted to get home and go for a bike ride.

Or another option?

I was overtaking safely?

3. moving with the general flow of the traffic

How much by? Might have to bend over and take it :s

4. Hey Officer, D’you party?

Yes, I’m sorry.

You could try driving at or below the speed limit. 😀

mikewsmith +1

Yes sir, no sir, three bags full sir etc.

“I was trying to increase the distance between you and me as you were quite close”

Worked for me once (was true though). Suspected it was a copper but was dark & couldn’t see him – followed me out of a service station and sat behind me. Tried 70, then low 60s and he just sat there so I gave it the beans and he pulled me over

Or else how about “you try driving slow when you’re coked off your tits”

Is this a black thing?…

Not sure which excuse to use for best results but, if you get “done” when asked your date of birth, give the date it is that day with an appropriate year of course.

You might get let off as its your birthday!

“you must of been speeding to stay with me……. so I’m making a citizens arrest!”

No need to say anything. Just accept your 3 points with dignity and carry on as normal. You won’t get nicked for another decade.

“I was trying to increase the distance between you and me as you were quite close”

See that’s reverse logic. What you shoud do if someone is too close is to decrease your speed until the gap becomes acceptable for the speed you are travelling……

just be honest and tell them, that’s what I’ve done and managed to get away with it… Do you realise how fast you were going? erm.. yeah, probably about 115mph. Yes, well I’ve just clocked you at 112mph… here’s a £60.00 ticket, be careful and remember the distance it takes to stop at that kind of speed 😯

See that’s reverse logic. What you shoud do if someone is too close is to decrease your speed until the gap becomes acceptable for the speed you are travelling……

[quote]Tried 70, then low 60s and he just sat there[/quote]I don’t know, oh master 🙁 what should I have done – evaporated ?

One of the guys I worked with got pulled for doing 92 on the motorway yesterday (he is a serial speeder, no one will get in the car with him from here).

The cop told him that if he’d just been a few miles an hour slower then he would have fallen within the cop’s discretion and he wouldn’t have booked him since it was a perfect day with no traffic on the road.

Not sure how true that is, but the officer was apparently very apologetic.

Getting done for speeding on a quiet motorway is bonkers.

Got pulled myself years ago – let the needle pop over 80 a touch in front of a cop car. Did the “No excuses from me officer”, took the lecture (delivered with a great deal of humour to be fair) and was sent on my way with a gentle ticking off.

Got stopped a few months later on the way back to Dallas by Texas State Troopers – a whole lot different experience; scared the bejeesus out of me – they polis things differently over there.

“I’ve just installed the new Strava motoring app…”

make a run for it, if they set the helicopter on you head for a big shopping center with a covered multistorey.

“Not sure how true that is, but the officer was apparently very apologetic.”

and thats what wrong with this country.

Getting CAUGHT speeding on a quiet motorway is bonkers…. if your not paying enough attention to the road notice the VERY OBVIOUS old bill then you certainly should not be speeding.

Getting CAUGHT speeding on a quiet motorway is bonkers…. if your not paying enough attention to the road notice the VERY OBVIOUS old bill then you certainly should not be speeding.

I think it was an unmarked car that pulled him over. I’ve got a habit of scanning every plate behind me for “SF” though!

‘Hello Sir. Do you know why I’ve stopped you?’

‘To let me know that you’ve caught the bastards who broke into my house and nicked my telly?’

Otherwise, if you were going a bit quick, just acknowledge it – no need to grovel – that’s your best chance of avoiding a ticket.

whats SF ?

I get round this problem by driving a van that barely does 80….. if it has a tailwind and a hill.

‘SF’ ?

Unmarked police cars in Strathclyde usually have registrations starting “SF”.

If there’s one behind you, it’s a good idea not to speed!

Be honest and pleasant and if you know what speed you were doing it shows you were paying attention.

My Mother (70 at the time) got away with 50mph+ in a 30 zone with “but it chugs if I go any slower in 5th” 😕

“do you know why I’ve pulled you over?”
“because you can smell the decomposing flesh in my boot, or you’ve a uranium detector that’s now gone haywire…? You are wearing a lead suit right?”

DrP

A mate of mine came out with “wouldn’t it be better if you where out catching burglars” when stopped for speeding once, not a good move.

You could do what my friend tried a couple of weeks back when he got pulled.

He’s a mechanic and still had his overalls on.

Plod asked why he was speeding. He comes out with “Oh! Sorry Officer this is a customers car and I’m trying to diagnose a misfire.”
Plod sends him on his way but asks him to be sensible and keep it under “about 85” 😀

I got stopped once for 45 in a 30 (no excuses apart from I genuinly thought it was a 40 limit) – I was nice to the guy and he let me off with a producer 🙂

Unzip your Pvc catsuit to expose the cleft of you ample busom, then waft your curly blonde hair around in a Cannonball run / Smokey and the bandit style. 20% of the time it works every time.

Buxom blonde fitness instructor friend of mine…

“Sorry office, I didn’t notice I was speeding. I was on the phone.”

Worked for her.

I was stopped for overtaking an officer in a 30. Dual-lane with a merge into one.

He was annoyed. The conversation went ‘whats the limit there’? 30. What were you doing? 40. Sorry Officer. Let me off 8)

Got stopped in February was doing well over 90.
I was honest with him said I was going too fast. He appreciated that told me to stick to 80 and let me get off on my way.

SA – Scotland: Glasgow
SB – Scotland: Glasgow
SC – Scotland: Glasgow
SD – Scotland: Glasgow
SE – Scotland: Glasgow
SF – Scotland: Glasgow
SG – Scotland: Glasgow
SH – Scotland: Glasgow
SI – unused
SJ – Scotland: Glasgow
SK – Scotland: Edinburgh
SL – Scotland: Edinburgh
SM – Scotland: Edinburgh
SN – Scotland: Edinburgh
SO – Scotland: Edinburgh
SP – Scotland: Dundee
SQ – unused
SR – Scotland: Dundee
SS – Scotland: Dundee
ST – Scotland: Dundee
SU – Scotland: Aberdeen
SV – Scotland: Aberdeen
SW – Scotland: Aberdeen
SX – Scotland: Inverness
SY – Scotland: Inverness

…

Hahaha its just the area code

My van has st does that make me an un marked car 😉

“I was trying to increase the distance between you and me as you were quite close”

Fool’s errand if ever there was one.

If someone’s persistently too close – pull over.

How about: “please stop beating me about the head officer. You’re hurting me. ”

coolhandluke – Member

Not sure which excuse to use for best results but, if you get “done” when asked your date of birth, give the date it is that day with an appropriate year of course.

You might get let off as its your birthday!

That didn’t work for me on Sunday 2 June, which was in fact my birthday! 😡