Speak to Macmillan too, they are really good, it will be really difficult but just try and be positive for her and fight it together.

In the middle of uncle having prostate cancer and my 36 year old sister having ovarian cancer at the moment and my wife is radiotherapist on local cancer ward, so it seems to dominate life.

very sorry to hear that mark, cant imagine whjat you all must be going through

virtual hugs

I wish you and your family all the love and best wishes in the world. Speaking from personal expereince (I have lost both my parents the same way) if it has come back then it is unlikely to go away. Make video of your wife with your kids, get her to make video messages for their wedding day, birth of their child, 18th birthday. I have no video of my father to show my children and just a little video of my mum, I would give anything for more video of them speaking or anything. and IIWY release all your savings and get off round the world or something, with your kids. School doesn’t matter. They can get educated later, some things are more important than school. 🙁

I first read this a couple of hours ago and didn’t comment because despite having been where you are now I don’t know that anything I can say or do can help right now. I don’t think I’ve ever seen, read or heard anything that even approaches the depth of emotions that you’ll be going through whilst you all try and cope with this.

Not that it’ll mean much but you’re both in my thoughts and I hope the time you have together can still be a time that you treasure.

I’m so, so sorry to hear this – I can’t even start to appreciate how horrendous this must be for you all. Like others have said (much better than me too) make the most of every minute of every day. Reading things like this make me realise how much of my life I waste and that I should appreciate my family and friends more than I do. I’m guilty of taking things for granted and this has made me realise how wrong I am to do so.

You’re in our thoughts, I wish we could do more.

mark d – so sorry to read that. Can’t imagine what you and your family are going through but my thoughts are with you. I hope that you all manage to make the most of the summer.

STW is always here and ready to listen if you want to vent/talk/hugs

Very best wishes to your family Mark. Tell the older child what you can. Children can handle bad news when given straight. Hope the treatment gives enough for the young one to make some memories. Never ask “why me”, it just does not help.

My sister’s four children don’t have a mother, but treatment managed to give them some memories.

And I wore my #fuckcancer socks to work yesterday for my mother.

sorry to hear that. there is nothing to say that can help. stay positive for the kids.

Cancer is a cruel disease.

Reading things like this make me realise how much of my life I waste and that I should appreciate my family and friends more than I do. I’m guilty of taking things for granted and this has made me realise how wrong I am to do so.

Sadly, it seems to be the human condition to not realise what we have till it’s gone/too late.

Thinking of you mate.

It ain’t over till it’s over..

#fuckcancer!

So so sorry to hear that. As others have said be as strong as you can, be as upset and angry as you want. It affects us all differently, what you’re going through was and remains my biggest fear after my wife was diagnosed just before Christmas 2013, thankfully she remains clear.
Sadly her mum passed in February after a short but tough fight with it too. It’s an awful disease.

Seek as much support as you can, thankfully we had excellent care and support both with my wife and her mum. Be honest with your children as you can be, they are remarkably resilient wonderful people. Thoughts are with you all.

Sad news mate. I’m sure she’ll keep fighting. Best of everything to you.

Please don’t stop posting on here if you need to. Other than that, there’s nothing much to add to the lovely responses of the rest of my fellow STWers. You will all be in my thoughts and prayers.

Sorry to hear your shitty news mark.

As suggested, make some great memories for all concerned. Use the help of your family & friends – seems some people are too scared to offer sometimes but that’s not the same as unwilling IME.

Hope for the best; prepare for the rest, and my very best wishes to you all

Oh mate, my heart goes out to you and your little family.

Sad, sad news Mark.

As others have said, you’d be amazed what a bunch of stangers on the internet can do whether it’s listen to you vent or more.

Make the most of the people around you, and that includes us.

[man hugs]

I haven’t read much of the comments; when reading them I get upset and say I will return.I will do at some point, kinda get upset when reading.
Yesterday was another amazing day. my brother died:
‘Stop drinking dudes, it’s bad for you’
Everything seems to be happening at the mo

Mark, that is properly tough times, you and your amazing little family have my thoughts, and I’m sure the same goes for all those who read and don’t post.
You’ll be amazed at how matter-of-fact kids can be about it all, we lost my sister 18 months ago and my mum seven months back, my 7yr old just took it all in his stride, and managed to find comedy and smiles for all even at the toughest of times.
There’s some great advice in all the other posts, just do what your instinct tells you is right and don’t worry about what you ‘should’ be doing or feeling. Lean on all those around you if it helps, plus all those you don’t even know yet who are going to help. Anything I/we can do, just say the word.
I’m going to go hug my wife and kids now (littlest is 7wks old, sleeps for wimps in this house!) and dig out the pink sweary socks for today in honour of your family.

All the very best wishes from all of us.

Spandex and all of you, thank you for just being there.
Sorry if I keep going on, writing here helps.
Another letter in this afternoon, more tests,
We get good news then bad in 3 month waves.
Being very positive in the run up to this one.
We are doing as much as we can, camping/ riding/ walking/ just being together as a family.
It’s funny, everybody calls us a very happy ‘outdoor’ family.
We’ll take that, we are indeed very happy with our children trying to have cheap camping weekends away, making memories.
Have a good weekend everyone x

was scared to open post, is glad he did. Keep going at it, happiness is a choice and while it would be easy to be down seems you and yours have the right attitude to say that no matter what, you can do it with a smile on. And that will carry you a long way.

Found out yesterday a mate has it – early stages and treatable skin cancer but still scary – he went to get a mole on his cheek looked at, turned out to be nothing but the dermatologist said that while he was there he should strip off and get the once over. That small pink mole on his shoulder that he hadn’t really noticed……Get those strange spots and moles checked everyone and be careful with the sun!!

Blessed that it was looked at quickly

I’m angry.
Been great talking here,
I don’t even get’ cuddles ‘anymore .

Mark – we went through a similar event to what you are going through now a couple of years ago – it is all still very raw and reading this thread has shaken me the my core – Vicki is now ok but terrified of if/when the horrid thing returns, hope its a never.
All i can say is keep close, talk lots, dont turn away help however little and shout if you need anything.
Best

So sorry you are still having to ride that shit rollercoaster. The ups and downs are hard to deal with – because you never get true respite.

Thinking of you Mark. Take care.

When I get back from Lanzarote in five days’ time, my oncologist will, albeit in a gentle and kind way, proceed to tell me that my cancer has reactivated in three separate sites. She is unaware that I know, and we’ll begin the process of discussing treatment protocols if there are any. Just after this I’ll drive to Cumbria to SSUK2017, and as I ride and spend time with others, I’ll reflect on how very lucky I am to have lived the life, loved the people and experienced the things I have in the last forty years. And then I’ll roll up my sleeves, take a deep breath and start the process once more of **** this disease in the head with a brick.

Be strong fella; what happens from now on defines you and your family’s future, however that turn she out. You sound like a pretty damn good dad to me.

All the very best, Bullheart.

So sorry to hear this Bullheart.
About time we had a ride out and a coffee/ beer/ cake.
Really appreciated your support and emails.
Jesus, I’m so sorry.

That’d be lovely. Don’t be worrying about my situation though; karma/life is a funny thing, and I reckon it’s better me having to deal with this ugly bugger than someone taking my place.

I rode a fat bike to the furthest end of the island before sunrise the other day, and managed to watch dawn break over the volcanos. I needed to work out what I was going to do, and it very much helped. Make sure you do the same – time to think/assess is important in formulating the right strategies.

Give me a bell whenever; I’ll probably have some time off soon…. 😉

Cancer is a prick.

he is unaware that I know, and we’ll begin the process of discussing treatment protocols if there are any.

I hear the next stage of treatment is leeches on the penis.

But seriously, they do put leec….sorry, that sucks, mate. (mild understatement).

I hear the next stage of treatment is leeches on the penis.

If that was the case I’d have cancelled the holiday, claimed on the travel insurance and booked a quiet hotel for the weekend for “treatment”…

Oxford in the morning.
Posting this at 03.48; I’m not worried all!!!!!!!!!!!!
Positive thinking
Should be sleeping
Going out of my mind; I should be cuddling her which is what I will do now.
Close curtains

Sorry to keep banging on.
Results Wednesday.
She has to give up work, I need to find work.
Realitiy

What we expecting/hoping from the results? Good things I assume given the trajectory things have taken?

Hoping we are going to live a long and happy life Jamie.

There are, it seems, many of us who have been affected in one way or other by this disease. Personally, I have more faith in alternative approaches to treatment than the established methods, which quite frankly, are not working and if they do, seem to create more issues. Whilst my attitude is particularly contentious on here, what have you got to lose by checking out and researching the approach of Rick Simpson?

It is not my intention to be a troll, or appear unsympathetic, I too have witnessed the slow demise and untimely passing of loved one’s and the anguish, pain and helplessness felt by all concerned.

My thoughts are with you and your family OP.

slackalice – Member
Personally, I have more faith in alternative approaches to treatment than the established methods, which quite frankly, are not working and if they do, seem to create more issues. Whilst my attitude is particularly contentious on here, what have you got to lose by checking out and researching the approach of Rick Simpson?

Ex-oncology nurse and oncology research contributor here. I’m sympathetic to the use of complementary therapies, but please- do go off and check your facts on standard treatments and current survival rates before you post such nonsense as “are not working “.

The last figures I saw showed that people using alternative therapies had 2.5 times the mortality rate.

Fair points both ^^

My earlier point being, we need to maintain an open view on all possibilities, like with many things, what works for one, may not be the remedy for another, but to exclude any possibility is potentially more damaging.

I’m pretty sure that my mum’s consultant will be choosing the course of treatment which will work best for her.