Bullying @ School - Parents, Teachers, PTA members, lawyers help!

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Bullying @ School - Parents, Teachers, PTA members, lawyers help!

33 posts & 21 voices | Started 1 year ago by geoffj | Latest reply from yossarian

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geoffj - Member

Long story short.

One of the kids at the local primary has issues and has been bullying several of the other kids. One of the parents of one of the bullied kids, has had enough and despite having various meetings with the head, with various assurances that action was being taken, has decided to ratchet things up a gear.

As Chair of the Parent Council (I've been in the job 2 weeks), she wants me to accompany her to the next meeting with the head and act as an independent (sic) observer / advisor.

I'm confident that the bullying is taking place and I suspect that the head is not being as effective / proactive as possible.
Having done the research, I'm expecting to push for the establishment of an action plan to address the bully's behaviour, which we can then monitor progress against.

However, it has been suggested to me that the Head may refuse to discuss sanctions or any actions she may take against the bully due to confidentiality / data protection issues. I can half see the logic in this, but I can't see how we can agree an action plan without identifying specifics.

Any advice / suggestions / way around this?

**off to find bullying and harassment policy statement in school handbook.

Posted 1 year ago #
hamishthecat - Member

Where is the governing body in this?

I think you should discuss with the Chair of Governors.

Posted 1 year ago #
geoffj - Member

Hamish - No Governors, its a local authority primary

Posted 1 year ago #
squiff - Member

This happened to my wife's aunties son, he was getting bullied for years on and off and the school did nothing so she took it into her own hands and told the police and got them involved and that soon got the school taking action. The school weren't impress that she got the police involved but it has done the job, best of luck.

Posted 1 year ago #
wombat - Member

I was under the impression that all LA primaries had governors,are you in England?

This should be raised with the Chair of Governors imediately as the Governing Body technically employs the Headteacher.

If you get no joy there, raise it with the Local Authority.

Record everything, confirm conversations in letters. Good luck.

Posted 1 year ago #
geoffj - Member

wombat - in Scotlandshire

Posted 1 year ago #
mogrim - Member

No idea about local government / schools stuff, but I've been to loads of difficult meetings... Make sure you take notes (ideally someone else would be assigned to the role, but if not available) and don't be scared to tell people to shut up while you're writing them down. At the end of the meeting read back the full list of decisions taken, and make sure you send a copy to all the participants ASAP.

Posted 1 year ago #
wombat - Member

geoffj - Member

wombat - in Scotlandshire

I'm in England and it's different here...I'd go to the Local Authority.

Posted 1 year ago #
flippinheckler - Member

If she's getting no joy with the head the go to the LEA to get something done.

Posted 1 year ago #
redthunder - Member

You need the services of "fourcrossjohn "

Posted 1 year ago #
chewkw - Member

Gang up on the head. i.e. put as much pressure as you can on the head for being incompetent and especially in her role. The pressure must be to such an extend that she might contemplate suicide or force to choose between her job or the bully. Get as many parents as possible and local media etc so to put the pressure on her reputation for being a spineless head. Basically, what you have is an incompetent bureaucrat throwing all the shitty rules at you to get you off her back.

Now go in big time ... no pussy footing around as some people are better succumb to be pressured rather than politeness especially fat bureaucrats ... make her work, make her sweat, make her shite, make her cry, make her life a hell if she think life is so easy.

Failing that kick the shite out of the bully gangsta style ... including his parents for failing to teach their kid manner ...

As my Texan cowboy mate once say ... "you don't take no shite"

Posted 1 year ago #
mcmoonter - Member

wombat - in Scotlandshire

In the interests of STW balance , other wombats are available

http://www.wombats.org/

Posted 1 year ago #
LabWormy - Member

.........or listen to Mogrim & Wombat.

Get the facts, document and repeat until bored.

Make sure that you have right to be there (that's just me not knowing the status of the Parent Council in Scotland).

Surf for ideas of best practice. Lots of schools have their procedures published. The NSPCC also have guidelines.

In the strange little world I know about, this pdf explains all, it also has further links at the end.

Did anyone mention facts and documentation?

Posted 1 year ago #
geoffj - Member

Cheers guys - plenty of good advice here.

Posted 1 year ago #
paul4stones - Member

The school should have an anti bullying policy (assuming that bit is the same as England). Get a copy and make sure it's been followed. If not ask why. If no joy then take it higher.

Posted 1 year ago #
epicyclo - Member

Don't forget there are legal remedies.

You don't have to wait for the school.

Police.

Posted 1 year ago #
kevonakona - Member

Gang up on the head. i.e. put as much pressure as you can on the head for being incompetent and especially in her role. The pressure must be to such an extend that she might contemplate suicide or force to choose between her job or the bully

Really?

Head commits suicide

Oh and you mean extent?

Posted 1 year ago #
Trekster - Member

Report the bully
Good luck.
I spent 2yrs escorting my daughter to & from school because authorities are gutless wonders.
Once the pupil bully was finally dealt with we then had a problem with a teacher. That took 6mths Teacher left the school
She(Daughter) is now a teacher and determined that no child in her care will ever go through what she did. She has become social works worst nightmare and had a few personal threats to contend with and has a class of 27 primary kids all with special needs.
As has been said above make a case history and keep notes on everything. This is the one thing which the "authorities" dislike most and is where we "won" our dispute. Times, dates, what and witnesses.
Are other children being bullied by this child? Will their parents be prepared to come forward?

Posted 1 year ago #
geoffj - Member

Are other children being bullied by this child? Will their parents be prepared to come forward?

Yes, and hopefully. I'm hoping that simply me being there, will force her to up her game and put the right processes in place.

Posted 1 year ago #
poly - Member

I'd suggest its not really the role of Parent Councils to get involved in representing individual parents in meetings with the head teacher. The parent council is about collective involvement in the big picture. As a new chairperson (2 weeks) its also probably not a good way to build the "partnership" that the PC and the Head should be striving towards.

Perhaps you can identify someone else who can support the parent in her discussion with the Head?

I'd also suggest that those suggesting the "police" "children's panel" option are jumping the gun - and the proposed meeting with the head (duly armed with the anti-bullying policy) is the right way to initiate a solution - but knowing (and if necessary reminding the Head) that their is scope for formal action if necessary.

Posted 1 year ago #
poly - Member

Yes, and hopefully. I'm hoping that simply me being there, will force her to up her game and put the right processes in place.

geoff, if you agree with my other comment that it's not your role, then if you can find someone else to represent her at the meeting - then there you may want to have a word with the Head to make her aware of your "wider interest" in bullying generally!

Posted 1 year ago #
geoffj - Member

Poly - You make some good points, thanks.

Posted 1 year ago #
fourcrossjohn - Member

somebody mentioned my name?

what can i do to help?

Posted 1 year ago #
chewkw - Member

kevonakona - Member

Really?

Head commits suicide

Oh and you mean extent?

She did not know which to choose. i.e. she did not know the priority. She chose to take her own life instead of putting pressure on those that were unable to perform. Bad decision that.

Posted 1 year ago #
duckman - Member

Gang up on the head. i.e. put as much pressure as you can on the head for being incompetent and especially in her role. The pressure must be to such an extend that she might contemplate suicide or force to choose between her job or the bully. Get as many parents as possible and local media etc so to put the pressure on her reputation for being a spineless head. Basically, what you have is an incompetent bureaucrat throwing all the shitty rules at you to get you off her back

You are trolling,right? I mean you can't really be this much of a muppet in real life. Seems the wrong thread to troll,imo.

OP; Poly is spot on,there are procedures that can and should be followed( Vary from authority to authority). Make sure those are in motion, as these wheels grind slowly.Procedures will be set out on Authority website. I am teacher in Scotland,email in profile if you want.

Posted 1 year ago #
chewkw - Member

duckman - Member

Prick

So you rather protect the bureaucrat then the kid?

Bureaucrat (head) has the choice to prevent the kid being bullied but the kid does not as the bully will continue to terrorise him/her whether s/he likes it or not.

So what say you? Bureaucrat or the kid being bullied?

You are trolling,right? I mean you can't really be this much of a muppet in real life. Seems the wrong thread to troll,imo.

No, if your kid is being bullied and you prefer to pussy foot?

The muppets are those that let it be and not take actions. There is a time to let it be and there is time to pile on pressure. If you pile on pressure you pile it hard otherwise you are pussy footing again.

Yes, you follow the rules but you need to know the rules better than the bureaucrats and if they are very institutionalised then you're practically dealing with non-human entity. i.e. the rules say so and no one is accountable or worst case scenario they tell you there is nothing they can do because the rules say so. Tough shite and the kid keeps getting bullied because no one is prepared to be accountable.

Posted 1 year ago #
duckman - Member

Good for you! Anyway, youngest back asleep NN.

Posted 1 year ago #
stratobiker - Member

The schools anti-bullying policy isn't working. Either because it isn't being followed or it isn't effective.

I think that's the starting point.

Posted 1 year ago #
fourcrossjohn - Member

its primary school....

take his milk carton privileges away?

Posted 1 year ago #
project - Member

Best nobody intimates, the head, the school staff, and education dept are not up to the job theyre paid to do, that may be construed as having a go at publicly funded staff that we all pay for.

Now thats totally wrong isnt it.

Posted 1 year ago #
Trekster - Member

OP; Poly is spot on,there are procedures that can and should be followed( Vary from authority to authority). Make sure those are in motion, as these wheels grind slowly.Procedures will be set out on Authority website. I am teacher in Scotland,email in profile if you want.

That is assuming that the school is prepared to recognise bullying is taking place
We ended up going down the police/CP route because the school would not take responsibility.
As a school board member I was on a panel interviewing for an assistant HT, one of the interviewees was the current temp assistant head. When the question about her views on bullying came up she denied there was a problem ignoring the fact that the other parent interviewer had an ongoing issue. In fact there were a number of concerned parents at that time
Like chewks last paragraph
At my daughters school the parents have their own way of dealing with these problems, bit like McCoist v Lennon

Posted 1 year ago #
Edukator - Member

An MP3 on record in the kid's pocket each morning.

Posted 1 year ago #
yossarian - Member

I work in education and have quite a bit of safeguarding experience.

First off ask 2 very simple questions of the head.

1. Had the schoool followed it's anti-bullying/safeguarding policy to the letter?

2. Can they prove it?

If you go hard enough at those two points you won't need to do anything else

Posted 1 year ago #

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