Scottish river police have already intercepted 500 English migrants attempting to cross the tempestuous River Tweed, in overloaded and ramshackle craft.
Chief Inspector Mc Tartan informed this reporter “This is the beginning of a whole new humanitarian crisis for Scotland. Who will take care of these pieces of human flotsam? Who will pay for all the blankets and mars bars? Not us, Jimmy.”
The UN are holding an emergency summit in Barbados to discuss how best to handle the immigration crisis.
Meanwhile those who survive the perilous crossing are being detained at a tent village just outside Kelso, while their applications for asylum are processed.

They received a traditional Scottish welcome.

then on to a real scottish welcome! 😆

Meanwhile those who survive the perilous crossing are being detained at a tent village just outside Kelso, while their applications for asylum are processed.

Jesus, Kelso? They’ll probably contract Rickets and die of Scurvy before getting out of the camp.

Scottish Borders Border Patrol Patrol the Border!

och no, we’ll welcome them with some healthy nourishing food

^^^ Or a traditional Scottish welcome ‘Come in ye’ll have had yer tea’

That photo of the Mars Bar menu is a Photoshop fake.

There are salads on the menu.

That couldn’t happen in Scotland.

For anyone interested in retreating south, I hear there is a boat heading south shortly with limited cargo capacity:

gobuchul – Member
That photo of the Mars Bar menu is a Photoshop fake.

There are salads on the menu.

That couldn’t happen in Scotland.The prices are in dollars… (but not in Dollar)

Very little room Matt, especially when they pack all the jobs into it 🙂

Will Scotland be accepting all of it’s world wide refugees back?

Will Scotland be accepting all of it’s world wide refugees back?

Only if the world agrees to hand back the place names copied from Scotland.

😉

Well spotted scotroutes. Also they sell octopus salad?! Never seen that in a Scottish chip shop.
I am sure a chip shop will deep fry a mars bar if you ask, but I have never come across any advertising it, never seen anybody order one or eat one.

Deep fried Mars bars are the 21st century version of Nessie. You’re confident it’s a myth then another photo of one appears. However unlike Nessie photo, Deep fried Mars bar photos never appear at the start of the tourist season.

Deep fried Mars bars are the 21st century version of Nessie.

Last time I went in, the Tay Fry Inn errr in Dundee sells them.

Dunkeld Fish Bar was flogging deep fried Turkish Delight not long ago as well.

Dont get me started on deep fried pizza, honestly WTF.

***shudders at the thought of a mock chop***

Dunkeld Fish Bar

Ace chippy.

had to Google mock chop after that I was slightly releived to find out what all the King ribs I have been eating are made of.

I occasinally ordered a deep fried pizza during school lunch breaks at the chippie in my youth, then finished it off with a can of coke and 3 packets of Tangy Tome. The days before you realize your own mortality.

I doubt you’d need to many of those lunches to realise your mortality

deep fried pizza

I love the way they dissolve the box. so tasty

I feel a coronary coming on just reading this thread.

I feel a coronary coming on just reading this thread.

A Sean Coronary?

For all you homesick Scots head to Epsom.
http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/deep-fried-creme-eggs