Hammer under the bed a bad idea – When you cave the scrotes head in whats the excuse for having a hammer?
Basically to not get done for murder, your weapon needs to be something you could reasonably explain as having been 'the nearest thing to hand'. A Maglite is much better. I use the maglite to look in the cupboard under the stairs as theres no light. If it just so happens to be the first thing I pick up then I have a reasonable excuse.
Therefore if you have the hammer, make sure you have some nails and a spare picture next to your bed. Then you can say it had been left there as you'd never got round to hanging that picture.
With golf clubs – keep a putting machine at the other end of your bedroom and some balls next to the bed – a bit of late night putting practise helps you relax.
And the machete / chain saw / axe ? – Sorry, thats up to you to work out