What’s next?

a bike that can fix the weather.

Carbon fibre or titanium dust caps.

What my dreams are made of.

IMO bike wash.

i used to have TI dust caps on my car.
HAD, is the operative word, parked in a street in a decent bit of glasgow for 10 minutes and they were gone.

There must be Ti dust caps already?

A bike wash, like a car wash, where you ride in, stick a pound in and there’s some big roller brushes and spray etc?

LED light enclosed in stem, batteries, driver, heatsink, LEDs. The lot.

LED light enclosed in stem, batteries, driver, heatsink, LEDs. The lot.

How would you adjust the beam direction? Or charge it up? And it would weigh quite a bit, and unless you plan on changing stems to ride during the day, you’ve got to carry that weight around..

Some sort of device for shooing dogs out of your way,

and for scraping dog pooh of your wheels,

A rambler avoidance device,

A chav nav, for giving indication of chavs near your shed or garage,

Handlebar holder for you to read your favourite magazine,

LED light enclosed in stem, batteries, driver, heatsink, LEDs. The lot.

That’s a cool idea. You could have the LEDs and driver in there, not sure about battery pack. But maybe that could be plugged in so you’re not carrying the weight around when not needed.

A bell in the shape of Mint Sauce’s head that let out a loud ‘Baaaa’ when required would be kinda useful

LED light enclosed in stem, batteries, driver, heatsink, LEDs. The lot.

Cannondale had this a couple of years ago in the stem of their higher-end Bad Boy hybrids, made by Exposure. They called it a HeadSight but it was basically a Joystick in two parts, a battery that fitted inside a fat stem and a stem faceplate (or rather, a shim inside the stem faceplate) with an LED unit on the front. The underside had a little socket to charge it up and you set it up by sliding the shim around before tightening the faceplate. Not a bad little light.

: P

LED light enclosed in stem, batteries, driver, heatsink, LEDs. The lot.

didn’t hope do this too a few years back, well it was a diff faceplate with light on it… i think…

edit: here it is

I’d like a lightweight 4 speed auto internal gear hub 🙂

A maintenance free bike (preferably full suss).

Heated grips.
Anti lock brakes.
Dog shit warning.

I recon in this age of increasing wheel sizes for easier rolling over rough ground a massive wheeled bike with direct drive to that wheel with low drag on the undriven wheel. Oh and cheap too, I would in these days of the Euro call it the Centifarthing 😆

Central Tyre Inflation?
Hollow Bearings?
Frame Integrated Airsprings?

a light geared hub would be great

punctureless tyres / tubes

frames with a built in hip flask

mudguards that don’t ruin “the look”

scratch proof paint

a decent internal BB located motor (to help you go up more so you can come down more and not cos I’m lazy)

adjustable geometry frames

quick release rims

Variomatic gearbox

ABS

ashtray

built in 12000 volt anti theft device

dog poo repellent

scratchless stancions

Upside down forks

built in MP3 player (with USB and 3.5mm jack)

Anyone from the industry wants some ideas, let me know, I’m overflowing with great ideas 😀

Engine.

On-board mini-bar.

Lazers for clearing trail sabotage.

A sticker on the back that says “Hows my riding?” and gives a 0800 number to call. If you call the number speech-to-text technology posts you’re rantings direct to the comments section of a randomly selected article on the Daily Mail’s website

– A single-piece all-weather “climate” suit. Thinking “Dune”. Something you could just blindly climb into on an early morning ride.

– An auto balancing Front and Rear suspension – set sag on one, and the other adjusts to match. Better yet – just sit on the bike and it guesses your weight.

– An on-the-move auto brake disc cleaner. There is a self-cleaning mechanism on most assault rifles’ bolt assemblies – so this should be possible.

– An anti OTH system. Volvo could probably invent something. A handlebar airbag?