Wasn’t going to post in this thread as I have no personal knowledge of racing and can’t offer much in the way of advice.
However one thing that carries through the 4 pages and 6 months is that you (Kryton) come over as being rather too negative on yourself.
Nearly all your posts are tindged with ‘oh well’ or ‘never mind’ type negativity.
I think you need to take a step back and actualy pat yourself on the back. I’m a similar age to you (45 on Friday), love riding bikes and have done for 30+ years – but I’ll never be anywhere near you in a race.
You need to stop thinking your racing positions are rubbish and questioning yourself all the time. Your positions are what they are and to say your racing snakes half your age I’d say they are damn good !
I sort of coach my wife as she is into triathlons. Not physically but mentally, and you have similar issues to the ones she faces.
One of the best bits of advice she got was to simply race herself. Forget others and the actual races. Use your training wisely but most of all enjoy your riding.
A race is just a combination of how much work you’ve done before and the mental attitude on the day. If you constantly have a downer on yourself and question why you are doing it, no amount of training will come to anything.
Hope that waffle make a degree of sense 😆