http://cgi.ebay.co.uk/ws/eBayISAPI.dll?ViewItem&item=120516765413&ssPageName=ADME:B:EF:GB:1123

"Here we have a spanking new, gleaming Bribo laptop, complete with instruction sheet showing you where to place your X when the time comes.

The government has declared that it will soon issue 270,000 of these Bribos to their core voters so that they may keep up with their children's school progress on the internet, rather than get up off their sofas and walk down to the parent-teacher meetings and ask. In order to exchange them for tax-free CASH, (to allow access to the things that REALLY matter), the inevitable result will be thousands of Bribos listed on eBay shortly after issue, so I am taking this opportunity to list mine now, before the rush.

Bribo is the latest offering in the "class war" series and will be issued exclusively to "low income" families, (i.e. not much money BEFORE benefits are freely distributed to you), so here is a great opportunity for middle-class, rich buyers, (i.e.anyone with initiative or a bit of cash after having paid swingeing tax and NI and not central within Labour's core vote buyers), to get one as well. Yes, yes, we know that you've already paid for these Bribos out of your hard-earned, heavily-taxed income, but that's not the point – after all, who doesn't want the warm glow of satisfaction that comes from paying for a Bribo, ensuring that the money gets to where it's needed – into the pockets of "low income" families, just in time for the general election.

With the Bribo's browser set to the Labour party home page, this machine is ready to go from the box. Full filters and software included to protect the user from harmful on-line experiences, including landing on any page that we consider to be contrary to Labour party targets and anything that doesn't toe the party line. Any deviation of use from the true purpose of the Bribo will be met with an "off-message".

If you've been happy to let the state control your life for the last twelve years and currently have trouble living without nannying, this is the machine for you."

Make sure you read the question and answer section at the bottom – it's priceless. Which is more than can be said for this scheme.