My eldest daughter, who is 7 btw, has decided that the coolest car in the world is a white Range Rover. I am gutted, crestfallen. I imagine it's like being homophobic and your son tells you he's gay.
She then, quite genuinely, asks why we can't buy one.
Firstly, like yeah, as if I could afford a range rover.
Secondly, they are, in this city anyway, driven by shallow vacuous people, usually wives of people who haven't slaved for years to be in a position to buy such a monstrosity.
Thirdly, my left of left political ideology finds such displays of wealth distasteful
Fourthly, nothing says 'I am a cock' better than driving a white range rover.
Fifthly, as a reasonable educated chap, I hope my daughter also gains an education and doesn't end up coveting a wag type lifestyle where the acquisition and display of expensive yet superficial material goods gives ones life meaning, but more importantly, shows everyone else how great your life is and that they should be extremely jealous.
She doesn't know it yet, but if she continues down this path and declares an affinity to David Cameron, I will be handing her over to social services.
The conversation finished with her asking 'can I still have an iPad mini for my birthday?'.....
I suspect she still loves white range rovers and probably thinks dad is a bit of a loser...