cheers guys, a long hot shower and some sleep always makes you see things a little clearer too!
all four crashes were my fault:
1) fist full of front brake on super greasy ground, wiped out
2) same as above it was about 3 hours later and the ground felt much drier, but again it was my silly mistake
3) got on the HT after a couple of weeks of only riding my newer bike, first thing i did was drop off a 2ft wall with hardly any pace = OTB
4) despite spending the whole ride moaning to myself that i was being a shit rider having crashed before even leaving the house i spent the first half of the ride trying to get my front wheels off the ground, similar to the story above i couldnt even pump off the curb as my timing was shot and i jsut got more and more frustrated....
instead of applying my mental skill-set (like a good jedi stooodent) i got increasingly frustrated and ended up 'pinning it' or 'riding faster' as you adults would call it. in the dark, over a bit of trail i didnt recognise, like an idiot. went too fast through a section and my front light drew my attention to what looked like a bump i could roll over, but the closer i got at speed i realised it was a drop that had been cut away at a nasty angle... my eyes fixated on it at the last millisecond and i forgot to pump at the right point = front wheel dropped 3 foot, forks bottomed out and over the bars into a tree i went.
little finger on right hand damaged but i dont think its broken, pain radiating down my radius and dodgy right elbow, which nicely balances out the pain in the left hand side of my hip from sunday
all my fault, need to have a little break and get my head back into the right place!
oh and i also need to get that back wheel you gave me mr yeti into a shop, realised before we set off that half the spokes are loose and some are bent (think that was playing on my mind, but for some reason it didnt stop me pushing on like and idiot).
its binners fault of course
i blame binners