Singletrack Forum » Topic: short but funny jokes please!

Singletrack Forum » Topic: short but funny jokes please! http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please en-US Wed, 30 May 2012 01:22:48 +0000 http://bbpress.org/?v=1.0.2 <![CDATA[Search]]> q http://singletrackworld.com/forum/search.php Three_Fish on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please/page/2#post-1117146 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 14:30:22 +0000 Three_Fish 1117146@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ What's grey and can't swim? . . . . . . . . . . A filing cabinet. oomidamon on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please/page/2#post-1117102 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 14:18:55 +0000 oomidamon 1117102@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ Wayne Bridge gave his ex-girlfriend a replica of his knob made from Cadburys chocolate. She said "Thanks, but I prefer Terry's" Olly on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1117018 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 13:58:58 +0000 Olly 1117018@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ creasing up in attempted silence in the office. its not working. Whats brown and rhymes with snoop? .... Dr Dre. (joke of the week for me, sorry) TimP on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116900 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 13:28:09 +0000 TimP 1116900@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ Why do mice have such small balls Because so few can dance . . . Why don't witches wear knickers? So they stick to the broom better CaptainFlashheart on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116897 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 13:27:22 +0000 CaptainFlashheart 1116897@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ druidh, that was neither short nor funny! Two goldfish in a tank. One says, "Any idea how you drive this thing?" Two parrots on a perch. One say, "Can you smell fish?" catfood on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116888 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 13:24:50 +0000 catfood 1116888@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ Jonny goes into the kitchen and tells his mum that granny has got a prawn . Mother says " What on earth do you mean Jonny ?" . He leads her into the living room where granny is snoring stark naked sat on the sofa . He points between her legs and repeats "Granny got a prawn". Mum tells him it ain't a prawn and that in fact it is her clitoris . To which Jonny replies .... "Well it tastes like a prawn " . woody2000 on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116808 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 13:07:58 +0000 woody2000 1116808@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ Did you hear the one about the stamp collecting irish dancer? He was called Michael Philately..... CheesybeanZ on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116580 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 12:08:04 +0000 CheesybeanZ 1116580@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ two blondes walk into a building , you`d think one of them would have seen it jon1973 on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116555 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 11:57:29 +0000 jon1973 1116555@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ My grandfather died in a german concentration camp. He fell off a guard tower and broke his neck yunki on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116252 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 10:35:08 +0000 yunki 1116252@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ what's the difference between an egg and a w@nk? you can beat an egg.... GreenK on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116241 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 10:31:49 +0000 GreenK 1116241@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ What do you call a fly with no wings? A walk. Shibboleth on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116198 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 10:16:17 +0000 Shibboleth 1116198@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ What's got 99 balls and makes fat women sweat? Bingo. martyc on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116181 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 10:13:39 +0000 martyc 1116181@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ Whats yellow and smells of bananas? Monkey sick ! greasystain on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116098 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 09:51:21 +0000 greasystain 1116098@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ What has 4 legs and 1 arm? A happy lion. <img src="http://singletrackworld.com/forum/my-plugins/bbcode-buttons/default/icon_smile.gif" title=":)" class="bb_smilies" alt=""/> mrvear on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116085 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 09:45:00 +0000 mrvear 1116085@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ Did you hear about the scarecrow who won the Nobel prize? They say he was outstanding in his field. PeterPoddy on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116067 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 09:34:25 +0000 PeterPoddy 1116067@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ An old lady goes to the doctors, complaing that she can't stop trumping constantly, but they are always silent and never smell "In fact," she says "I've done seven since I came into your office just now..." The doc gives her some pills and tells her to come back in a week The old lady returns "Doctor, there's no change apart from the fact that they now smell REALLY bad!" Doctor says "Great, that's sorted your sense of smell, now lets work on your hearing!" duckman on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1116023 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 09:16:48 +0000 duckman 1116023@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ Whats pink and wrinkly and hangs out your pajamas? Your granny. Dibbs on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1115969 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 08:32:17 +0000 Dibbs 1115969@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ Two guys were discussing popular family trends on sex, marriage, and family values. Stu said, 'I didn't sleep with my wife before we got married, did you?' Leroy replied, 'I'm not sure, what was her maiden name?' --------------------------------------------------- A little boy went up to his father and asked: 'Dad, where did my intelligence come from?' The father replied. 'Well, son, you must have got it from your mother, cos I still have mine.' --------------------------------------------------- 'Mr. Clark, I have reviewed this case very carefully,' the divorce Court Judge said, 'And I've decided to give your wife £775 a week,' 'That's very fair, your honour,' the husband said. 'And every now and then I'll try to send her a few pounds myself.' --------------------------------------------------- A doctor examining a woman who had been rushed to A&E, took the husband aside, and said, 'I don't like the looks of your wife at all.' 'Me neither doc,' said the husband. 'But she's a great cook and really good with the kids.' --------------------------------------------------- An old man goes to the Wizard to ask him if he can remove a curse he has been living with for the last 40 years. The Wizard says, 'Maybe, but you will have to tell me the exact words that were used to put the curse on you..' The old man says without hesitation, 'I now pronounce you man and wife.' --------------------------------------------------- A blonde calls the Airlines and asks, 'Can you tell me how long it'll take to fly from Ringway to New York City ?' The agent replies, 'Just a minute.' 'Thank you,' the blonde says, and hangs up. --------------------------------------------------- Moe: 'My wife got me to believe in religion..' Joe: 'Really?' Moe: 'Yeah. Until I married her I didn't believe in Hell.' --------------------------------------------------- A man is recovering from surgery when the Surgical Nurse appears and asks him how he is feeling. 'I'm O. K. but I didn't like the four letter-words the doctor used in surgery,' he answered. 'What did he say,' asked the nurse.. 'Oops!' --------------------------------------------------- While shopping for holiday clothes, my husband and I passed a display of bathing suits. It had been at least ten years and twenty pounds since I had even considered buying a bathing suit, so I sought my husband's advice. 'What do you think?' I asked. 'Should I get a bikini or an all-in-one?' 'Better get a bikini,' he replied. 'You'd never get it all in one.' He's still in intensive care. .......................................................................... slimtubing on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1115960 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 08:25:11 +0000 slimtubing 1115960@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ What's orange and sounds like a parrot? A carrot. What's black and white and eats like a horse? A Zebra What did the fish say when he swam into a concrete wall? Dam. NickyB is going downhill on "short but funny jokes please!" http://singletrackworld.com/forum/topic/short-but-funny-jokes-please#post-1115750 Tue, 09 Feb 2010 00:12:12 +0000 NickyB is going downhill 1115750@http://singletrackworld.com/forum/ two fish in a tank, one says to the other "how do you drive this thing?" did you hear about the magic tractor? it went down a road and turned into a field!!! Hope your missus gets better soon! x