Fresh Goods Friday 278

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We’ve been thinking hard about some truly difficult questions this week. Not meaning of life type stuff, as mountain bikers we solved that little riddle years ago – no, some which are MUCH more difficult:

What do they carry polystyrene around in when they ship it round the country?

Who draws the lines on graph paper?

When sign makers strike, do they write anything on their signs?

Why do they make scented toilet paper?

Shouldn’t Microsoft be called Macrosoft these days?

But eventually we get bored of such navelgazing, and look at bike stuff instead…

Boardman MTB Pro FS

Price: £1499

From: Boardman Bikes

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This is the catchily named MTB Pro FS – Boardman’s flagship FS bike, and tester Antony has his mitts all over it, so he took the pictures. We’re not entirely sure what the deal is with the stampeding horse in the background though. Perhaps it represents Antony’s glorious legpower? The one on the right looks less than impressed. That one clearly represents Antony’s analytical prowess.DSC08107You get a RockShox Monarch on the back…
DSC08109And a Pike on the front – FTW!DSC08110Despite popular rumour, this bike has a threaded BB. And asymmetrical chainstays with pots and pots of clearance…DSC08111…see?DSC08112And Guide brakes. Horst-link type suspension, too. Sweet. It’s running 740mm wide bars, and there’s room and routing for an internal dropper post too.

Endura Humvee Helmet

Price: £35

From: Endura

DSC_1021Budget lid with impressive looks, and a removable visor. Lack of ears, model’s own. It’s also available in green, white and black, colour fans!

Endura MT500 and SingleTrack Backpacks

Price: MT500 £99.99 SingleTrack £59.99 without bladder; £20 extra for the bladder

From: EnduraDSC_1022Back-luggage from Endura. The MT500 on the right has 15l capacity, room for a half or full-face helmet on the back, knee pad straps and a waterproof panel at the bottom, and a koroyd spine protector. The SingleTrack backpack at left is slightly smaller, with a 10l capacity and a removeable helmet carrier. You can get them with or without bladders, and you can buy the spine protector separately for the SingleTrack pack if you like. Here’s what it looks like…

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An Endura Koroyd spine protector, last week

…it’s basically loads of straws stuck together (well, that’s what it looks like) so it’s dead breathable and dead strong.

Endura MT500 Burner Ratchet Shorts

Price: £64.99

From: Endura

DSC_0984

Rugged oxford canvas shorts, so tough as you like; good length, lots of sizes, mesh lined, black and yellow print. ‘Interesting’ pose by our model, there.

Polaris AM Flux Waterproof Shorts

Price: £79.99

From: PolarisDSC_09893 layer fabric, fully taped seams, long as a long thing (but not actually trousers or 3/4 shorts), pockets, drawcord. Ideal for keeping your nethers dry, warm, cosy, and in peak tip-top condition in the next deluge. And more interestingness in terms of poses.

Skratch Energy Chews

Price: £21.95 for a packet of 10

From: Silverfish
DSC_1023Sweets! But energy sweets! So you don’t need to feel as bad filling your face with them as you hurtle along. Raspberry and Orange flavour, and Packed With Gnar.

Belgian Beer

Priceless

From: WindWave

DSC_1027Those lovely people at WindWave gave us a bottle of Belgian Beer at Core last week which we’re trying not to drink too fast lest is sends us squiffy, which apparently such things are wont to do.

Sock Guy Love Haters socks

Price: £9.95

From: Silverfish DSC_1028Well, just look at them. How ace are these?

…and if you’ve not seen this yet (it’s an oldie, but a very, very goodie), I have to tell you it is unadulterated GENIUS.

That’s a wrap for this week! Keep your eyes peeled for next week’s exciting episode, when Sheila finds Bill in delectes flagrante with the lawnmower, and Rob and Trevor do battle over who has the curliest sword… enjoy the weekend!

 

ST out.

Barney Marsh takes the word ‘career’ literally, veering wildly across the road of his life, as thoroughly in control as a goldfish on the dashboard of a motorhome. He’s been, with varying degrees of success, a scientist, teacher, shop assistant, binman and, for one memorable day, a hospital laundry worker. These days, he’s a dad, husband, guitarist, and writer, also with varying degrees of success. He sometimes takes photographs. Some of them are acceptable. Occasionally he rides bikes to cast the rest of his life into sharp relief. Or just to ride through puddles. Sometimes he writes about them. Bikes, not puddles. He is a writer of rongs, a stealer of souls and a polisher of turds. He isn’t nearly as clever or as funny as he thinks he is.

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